The Ka-nitting Factory

THE KA-NITTING FACTORY HAS MOVED

2007-08-16T00:20:00.000-06:00

If your browser doesn't redirect you to the new site - GO HERE.

One love.

Okay...and now some more Kristin Hersh

2007-08-14T01:43:00.000-06:00

I look so much like my mother

2007-08-14T01:22:00.000-06:00

Can't sleep. Lars is in Vernal on a river trip with a couple of his clients. It's funny how you forget how to sleep on your own - how does the weight of a lover's body next to us become such an addiction? More than that. A few years ago I read an interesting book about the physical/ chemical/ physiological aspects of love. It's main thesis: that our bodies actually become biochemically connected - just spending time together, touching.

I have no idea if that's true, but I still can't fall asleep.

I think the Throwing Muses said it better than I could.

The most profound post ever written

2007-08-08T12:37:00.000-06:00

I've been painting my nails a lot lately. Last month I got a manicure and I've been obsessively lacquering ever since. I bought some really cheap polish - the kind that 12-year old girls buy at the drugstore with their bubblegum money. The colors are bright and garish enough to call attention - something I don't normally relish.

The bright, aqua blue elicited enthusiasm from the check-out girl at the Emigration Market. The shimmering purple caused an elderly woman in a wheelchair to grab my left hand and hold it for about 3 minutes while telling me all about her daughter who now lives in New Jersey.

Painted nails make me want to point things out to people. Both literal things and figurative. "Have you ever noticed this sign before? Aren't the colors lovely? Isn't the font nice?"

I'll point with my short, purple-painted nail on my stubby, outstretched finger and we'll all look up together.

Add a Ka-nitting Factory!! button to your blog or MySpace

2007-08-08T11:23:00.000-06:00

"in space, Bret....in space."

2007-08-07T22:55:00.000-06:00

Flight of the Conchords rules my shit right now. You should be their MySpace friend and buy their new EP "The Distant Future" on iTunes.

、Oliver Twist 性交しなさい!!!!!!

2007-08-07T19:14:00.000-06:00

Japanese to English translation = "Have Sexual Intercourse, Oliver Twist!!!" or in other words, Fuuuuuck you!

My friend Melissa is still in Japan and while I'm seething with envy, I want her to come home. Is that selfish? Yargh.

The Oliver Twist whom this post is directed at is someone I sort of loosely work with...more work around. Anyway, as per usual I cannot get into too many details. Let's just say, it is a bitch and it must die.

I finally fixed the masthead. It's not the glorious (I almost typed "glory hole" - I really have to leave work now) banner I promised, but it's cute enough for now and it makes me laugh...and I made it happen. I designed some web. What is it they say about bringing your work home?

Web developing is going well. Maybe even too well. I'm so happy- I'm scaring myself. I LOVE, LOVE my boss. She's an amazing woman who makes me laugh and is inspiring and caring and - I could go on, but it would be gross. She actually said to me, "Tracy, when are you going to have a baby? I just love babies" while we were at a co-workers baby shower. Uhh... When is the last time a boss begged their employee to get knocked-up and take a bunch of time off work? It really sums up how wonderful she is - and I have to say, soothed any fears I may have had about getting P.G. while in the honeymoon stage of a new job (should that happen).

"A whole new world....a whole new place to - " Oh, sorry- Aladdin attack.

Dear Masthead,

2007-08-06T17:24:00.000-06:00

You are currently pretty fugly, but, I had to design something quickly to test the code. I promise I will make you prettier sometime this week and make a real, actual, beautiful logo that all your friends will be jealous of.

It will be the Peaches & Cream Barbie of mastheads.

So there.

Lovies,

Mom

P.S.

Mommy's tired.

Is it weird that I saw Ace Frehley from Kiss??

2007-08-02T15:41:00.000-06:00

Click on the image to see it a little better.

Flight of the Conchords

2007-08-01T22:38:00.000-06:00

Okay, I'm only slightly obsessed.

Mirah Mirah on the wall

2007-08-01T22:04:00.000-06:00

I made you a Mirah mix, because I love you.

*** Sorry, I'm a tease. The link should work now.

Rosie O'Donnell kinda scares the shit out of me

2007-08-01T10:52:00.000-06:00

Really...and you though my blog was crazy.

At least I don't write poems about Paula Abdul and celebrity stylists.

So many Myspace Surveys, so little time

2007-07-31T09:33:00.000-06:00

1. Who was the last person you slept in a bed with?
Lars

2. Where was the last place you went out to eat?
this crazy diner called Smitty's in Idaho Falls

3. What was the last alcoholic beverage you consumed?
some really, really, really crappy wine I bought in a Rexburg grocery store just because I could

4. How many significant others have you cheated on?
none

5. What is more essential - a pretty face or a great body?
um, shallow much? and also - I'm not a dude, dude....so when you say "pretty face" it makes me think of Orlando Bloom who makes me want to yack.

6. What is the value of all the jewelry on you?
do you want to rob me, now is that it?

7. Medicine, fine arts, or law?
Bon Jovi, happy trees, Law & Order

8. When was the last time you got a good workout?
ummm...

9. Best kind of pizza?
Veggie Delite from Papa Murphy's

10. If you need a new pair of jeans, what store do you go first?
I don't wear jeans, biiitch

11. Where did your last hug take place?
in my bedroom

12. What were you doing at 11:59 PM on Saturday night?
watching Hellraiser: Hellworld in a hotel in Rexburg

13. Are you a quitter?
not really, no.... are YOU a quitter?

14. Who was the last person you had in your room?
dogs and cats

15. Is your bedroom window open?
you really are trying to rob me - fucking, no.

16. Can you speak another language?
English, motherfucker - do you speak it?

17. How about put your legs behind your head?
uhhh

18. What is in store for your future?
I'm going to eat breakfast for lunch with some friends

19. Who was the last band you saw live?
this is really sad, cos it's been a while and I honestly don't remember

20. When was the last time you went dancing while under the influence?
1993

21. Do you take care of your friends while they're sick?
If they needed me, I would

22. What is your favorite soda?
iced tea

23. How many songs are on your iTunes?
3111

24. When was the last time you received something over $500?
like someone gave me some worth more than that?? I have no idea...probably my wedding two years ago

25. Have you been through driver's ed yet?
no, but I'm turning 15 next week....so look out.

26. What will you be next school year?
too old to answer these kinds of questions

27. Who is your favorite person to have a serious conversation with?
Sirius Black.

30. Are you experienced?
like in a Jimi Hendrix kind of way?

31. Any historical figures that you envy?
Divine

32. Describe what you're wearing in detail?

why? Okay, whatever.

33. What brand of digital camera do you own?
Olympus

34. What do you think about people who party a lot?
I don't think about them. I'm too busy getting a good night's sleep like a granny

35. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?
Not really, no. Unless you're my dirty, old boss who liked to talk about Crisco and butt plugs and shit...I guess, there's a limit.

36. What makes a perfect evening?
good movie or tv, good food, cuddling etc...

37. Who was the last person to sleep over at your house?
uhhh... I think my brother-in-law slept over like a year ago

38. iPod?
I would die without it, so if you're still thinking of stealing shit from me, just remember that I'd rather kick your balls into to hamburger than let you have it.

39. How often do you tan, if you do at all?
my driving arm is pretty tan

40. What was the last CD you purchased?
The Very Best of Hall & Oates

41. Have you ever been offered a job?
Yep

42. What are two bands/singers that you will always love?
Hall and Oates - duh and Prince

43. Have you ever stolen anything off of a road?
I stole some money that flew out of a guy's car...but, only because when I stopped to help him pick it all up, he was the HUGEST asshole

45. Who was the last person you rode in a car with?
Tawnya

46. What of the seven deadly sins are you guilty of?
I've probably been guilty of all of them at some point

47. Do you do homework in coffee shops?
No, because I don't have homework because I'm what they call a grown-up. Sort of.

The more I see Bill Paxton's ass - the more I kinda of love it

2007-07-30T23:20:00.000-06:00

When I first started watching Big Love, I had no idea what to expect - At first I was prudishly put off by all the husband-sharing and gratuitous polygamist bang-bang... but, most of all - I was off put by how many times the camera found its way to Bill Paxton's naked butt.

Bill has always been quite special to me, in an older brother kind of way. He was Chet in Weird Science - he was the semi-retarded "Yeah man, let Bishop go" guy in Aliens. I've refused, until now - dear reader to ever feel sexual feelings for him. It must be true what Tipper Gore says about repetitive violent imagery in the media - only, I'm not so much desensitized as converted.

Okay, HBO? Do you hear that? You've converted me to the sex cult of Bill Paxton's backside. I hope you're happy now.

Myspace survey 2007 "so far"

2007-07-25T15:57:00.000-06:00

First 7 months of 2007:

1. Have you had your birthday yet?
Nope

2. Are you with the same person as you were at the beginning of 2007?
Yes

3. Are you still in the same job?
Same place/ Different job (Woo (fucking) hoo!)

4. Is your favorite color the same color?
Eh, it's always changing. Right now I'm really loving the aqua/red combo....and purple

5. Have you got the same style/color hair?
basically

6. Have you bought a new car this year?
I bought a car that is new to me.

7. How many girlfriends/boyfriends have you had this year?
like 20

8. Have you been involved with the police this year?
What do you mean by involved?? I had one pull me over and then not listen to me AT ALL...and then say "that's a long name" after looking at my driver's license

9. All time drinking place for 2007?
the titty bar - definitely the titty bar

10. Is your best friend(s) at the start of 2007 still your best friend?
Yes, though if Tawnya doesn't stop trying to give my brownies away - we're going to have a problem.

11. Got any tattoos or piercings this year?
not yet this year, no. I really want a new tattoo though.

12. Had a hair cut?
I just got one - how ya' like them apples?

13. Been in hospital this year?
I took Tawnya to the hospital when she dislocated her shoulder - again.

14. Lost someone you cared about this year?
to say who would reveal too much about the plot of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

15. Been on a vacation this year?
nope

16. Been in love this year?
totally

17. Fallen out of love this year?
nope

18. Been kicked out of a pub this year?
I've been kicked out of like 10 pubs.

19. Completed any studies this year?
I'm going to start some studies

20. Read a book this year?
no- just magazines and liner notes

21. Worst thing to happen this year?
actually, I can't think of anything really bad. CHeck me out.

22. Best thing to happen this year?
NEW. JOB.

23. How many times have you gotten drunk?
eh

24. Have you fallen for someone this year?
I fall for Lars like 10 times a week

25. Has this year been a good one so far?
Sure.

Netflix

2007-07-25T15:50:00.000-06:00

I just spent half an hour adding things to my Netflix queue and rating movies and I realized something. I think I give away that 5 star rating way too easily.

I know the secret of the Deathly Hallows and I'm not telling.

2007-07-22T01:16:00.000-06:00

Today, I read Harry Potter and the Death Hallows from beginning to end. I started around 1 am, fell asleep at three, woke up - read. Took a shower - read - and by 7:30 p.m. I knew the fate of You-know-who, countless Death Eaters, Muggles, centaurs, goblins, snakes, werewolves, Ministry of Magic whosie-whatsits, owls, house-elves, Harry Potter and all his little friends.

Not that I'm going to tell you lot.

When I finally ventured out into the universe (otherwise known as the grocery store) I felt a lot like I did after finally having sexy-time for the first time. Like I knew something both wonderful and ordinary - something that was completely mine, but totally familiar to everyone else. In that way - in the way that connects us all to both the magical and the ordinary - the Harry Potter books are a lot like getting it on.

Or something. I'm out of it, what do you expect, I've been reading all day.

New Job - day two

2007-07-17T23:21:00.000-06:00

So, after the second full day of working my new job I can honestly say - holy shit! Do they really expect me to work like this all the time? I would suspect their answer is, yes, those motherflippers. Those wonderful, glorious motherflippers.

Interestingly - I don't mind. I worked my chubby buttocks off all day, without ONCE checking my MySpace. I didn't read "my blogs," watch YouTube or shop for cute dildos shaped like dolphins. NOT ONCE. I mean, not to blow my cover, but what you just read above describes about 2/3rds of my adult working life...and now it's over. And - I'm not sad. (I mean there's always time for dildos at home, right?)

The work is really collaborative and interesting (most of it anyway) and I spent the better part of my day rearranging a "mock up" of the library's future homepage. A fucking mock-up. I got paid to make something totally fake that I will just have to re-code again...and I liked it.

I will say that it's lonely. Everyone is really nice - but, so far there's no one I really connect with. I realize of course that my previous office mates (and friends) were a fluke. I know that finding hilarious, brilliant, bosom friends (ha! bosom) who make you laugh yourself sick and never stop surprising or inspiring you is rare, but I never understood just how rare until now. I really, really miss having good friends around to make my day easier and sometimes even special.

I don't anticipate any friend-love in my current sitch, but they're nice enough co-workers and that's not so bad, right? Right.

Yargh. Check out picks of my new office and my tits here.

I know it's wrong to care.....but, I really, really do.

2007-07-10T14:06:00.000-06:00

THE MuthaTruckin' Hills Returns August 13.

"Cos, ya' know...you mean so much to me." Awesome.

And don't I know it?

2007-07-10T10:35:00.000-06:00

Sicko - Your American Life Exclusive Clip!

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Dear You (You Know who you are),

2007-07-10T00:13:00.000-06:00

Do you remember the time you told me - ah, fuck it, what's the point?

Dear readers,

In honor of my new (old) car and my new (new) job - yes, I got a new job- (one that won't make me sick) - I am creating a double-disc, musical mix that will blow your friggin' mind. Do you want one? If so, leave me a comment or send an email with your preferred mailing address.

America's Boyfriend Keith Olbermann and His latest Special Comment- Smackdown

2007-07-04T02:22:00.000-06:00

When polygamy is legal - Keith, me and Lars are going to be a family.

I feel SickO to my stomach

2007-07-02T16:14:00.000-06:00

Lars and I saw Sicko over the weekend - for our date night no less. To be fair, it was totally my idea. We were both really wanting to see the new Die Hard movie as well, but we had our voting dollars to consider. Do we give opening weekend box office $$ to Michael Moore or Bruce Willis? I seriously love Bruce's work and you can be sure I will be watching the shit out of Live Free or Die Hard sometime this week, but I couldn't justify it until I'd made a point of seeing Sicko.

The movie is by far Moore's most bleak. I was in full-on tears within the first 5 minutes...and while I know he's a provocateur, Moore mostly lets the horror and success stories speak for themselves.

When are we all moving to France?

Help Me Bring the Buffy Musical Sing-a-long to Salt Lake

2007-06-29T11:09:00.001-06:00

Write an email to both the Salt Lake Film Society and the Buffy musical folks.

As an adult, I love some TV shows like people

2007-06-28T00:21:00.000-06:00

Buffy, of course.

X-Files

Homicide: Life on the Streets

Angel

Next Generation, bitches

The Beloved and Departed Veronica Mars

Battlestar

Freaks and Geeks

My So Called Life

The Office (UK)

My love of Degrassi the next generation, probably seems kind of pervy, but it's not

The Doctor